Ladies Who Launch

by Heather Strang

Balance is one of those concepts that really gets a woman thinking. What does it mean to live a balanced life? Is balance the end all, be all? Does balance mean happiness? Is balance even achievable?

We often think of balance as “having it all” and managing it well. The problem, of course, is that having it all is a lot to put on one’s plate. You may have heard about the woman who has it all and balances it effortlessly, but have you actually met her?

We decided to find out what the real deal was, from real women. Turns out, some women absolutely believe in the ability to live a balanced life, as long as the definition of balance is adjusted. Others refuse to buy into what they feel is a myth and instead prioritize their lives. And still others believe it’s tough, but worth the battle. Here’s the full scoop, straight from the mouths of 20 fabulous ladies …

Heck Yeah, Balance Exists!

“Balance means doing what I am actually doing, rather than multitasking, depleting myself of energy, and missing out on the many moments of my life for having a divided attention span and over-burdened nervous system. If working diligently for weeks on end leaves me suddenly aware of myself staring at the monitor screen, listless and uninspired, my relationship with work has taken me out of balance. The impulse to push away from my desk and go to a museum for an hour or to slip into a cafe and journal a bit on my dreams is the balancing act, allowing something else in my life to have weight and importance.”
Tevis Gale, Balance Integration Corporation
New York City

“Balance is not a myth, but it often feels like it because lack of balance is so prevalent among women in our society. While most think of balance in terms of juggling schedules, I believe true balance can best be experienced when a person’s outer actions line up with her inner values and beliefs.”
Jennifer Read Hawthorne, Author
Fairfield, IA

“Balance for me is a feeling that I’m not ticking off items on my day planner without thought and intention. The entire fallacy of having it all as an impossible dream is just not true. Granted, we cannot do it all at one time, but we have our lives to decide what we want to do and when we want to do it, so with a little planning and patience, there is time for everything.”
Mary Carlomagno, Order.
Hoboken, NJ

“How I spend my time on balance is to focus on the best that my life is providing for me, and to consciously guide my thoughts and actions toward my highest and best visions and goals. I choose to see beauty in everything. I ask myself, ‘What is perfect about every situation?’
For me, no one can tell if I’m working or playing or playing or working because I am doing both. It’s an attitude.”
Kate Romero, Guardian Angel Enterprises
Studio City, CA

“Balance is not a myth, it’s a tightrope dance. The analogy being that you are forever trying to not fall off the rope, health-wise, family-wise, business-wise, and socially. If you stay on the tightrope, you have succeeded. Balance is a mental, physical, spiritual, and social state of mind, all interconnected, all of the time. If you believe you can have it all, you will.”
Amber L. Nieves, Country Insurance & Financial Services
Beaverton, OR

“I start my morning with a spiritual practice which includes spiritual reading, journaling, and silent meditation. The idea is to ground myself in my highest energy and thoughts first thing in the morning. This provides the anchor for me to come from that high vibration in everything I do that day. Balance to me is taking care of my mind, body, and soul equally.”
Lubna Khalid, Real Cosmetics
New York City

“Maybe T. S. Eliot answered it best when he said, ‘Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.’ What is impossible? Isn’t it all about our dreams? If your dream is for a balanced life, then I believe you can make it happen.”
Sidney Small, Accounting Solutions for Women Entrepreneurs LLC
New York City

“I think a big part of succeeding at balancing is the ability to delegate both at work and at home while surrounding yourself with great people who you can count on to deliver to your expectations.”
Talia Mashiach, Eved Services and VendorCheckin
Chicago

Balance, Schmalance …

“Balance is absolutely a myth. Life is a rollercoaster—there are highs and lows. Things can’t possibly even out to a ‘balanced life.’ The idea of balance is tied in closely to the concept of control, and if you think you’re going to control what the universe is throwing your way, think again. C’mon, how many times have you dressed up for a business meeting, and just before you walk out the door, the baby pukes on you or your son’s school calls to let you know he’s sick and needs to be picked up? When life feels like it’s balanced for an hour or two, I breathe it in and appreciate the calm. Then I get ready for the next storm, because I know it’s coming.”
Erica Ehm, The Yummy Mummy Club
Toronto

“Sometimes I feel like I’m balancing as fast as I can. Which, of course, means I’m just falling off the see-saw. Balance is something to hope for, but like a clean house, a perfect manicure, and 15 minutes of undisturbed rest, it’s just not something that’s going to happen while I have two kids, a full-time job, and a mother who checks for dust bunnies. If I had a wife, I would be balanced. I’m writing this while making dinner, helping my son combine fractions (or something like that), and waiting for Federal Express to pick up a proposal I absolutely promised would get there overnight. Wait—I get it—I’m juggling, not balancing!
Lisa Bernstein, What to Expect Foundation
New York City

“I am a full-time mother, wife, and surgeon without perfect balance. I find that I have to prioritize the things that are most important to me. My family and patients come first, and everything else is secondary. Things I used to believe were important are not anymore. Finishing the laundry is not important, but playing a game with my children is. Having a clean desk in my office is not important, but doing well for someone during surgery is. I realize I have to feel comfortable with ‘mediocre’ when it relates to less important things.”
Dr. Elisa Burgess, Burgess Plastic Surgery
Tualatin, OR

“Having quality time with our families, enough downtime for a rich social life, and the energy to focus on our own personal journeys doesn’t always equate with a high-stress, well-paying, demanding job. Sometimes taking a job that is less stressful (and with a lower salary) is the route to achieving these other things. Ultimately, we make choices every day on how we want to spend our time and what things are most important to us.”
Deborah Reber, Author
Seattle

“There’s simply no such thing as balance. I’m more in favor of women creating priorities. For me, time spent with my husband is my priority over work, although I was spending far more time with work than him. In 2007, I was the most productive I had ever been in my entire life, but I was not balanced. Once I realized that my husband is my priority, it shifted how much time I’m willing to give to work. I now turn my computer off at 6 p.m. and cook dinner for my husband and spend time with him. Women who are trying to balance everything are always looking ahead at what needs to be done next. Before you know it, you’re a human doing, not a human being.”
Christine Hassler, Author, Speaker & Life Coach
Santa Monica, CA

“Having ‘balance’ implies this false sense of always having everything under control, and with this hectic world that we live in, it’s an unrealistic expectation. In order to have balance, you have to prioritize, collaborate, delegate, let go of draining relationships, and ‘don’t sweat the small stuff.’”
Jennifer Groover, Jennifer Groover Productions
Broomall, PA

Yeah, Balance Is Possible, But It’s TOUGH

“Balance isn’t a myth, but it’s definitely difficult. I believe balance can be achieved by those who know how to plan accordingly and have an excellent support system.”
Lisa Sugar, Sugar Publishing
San Francisco

“For a long time, I thought balance was a myth! In reality, it is something you can achieve, but it takes a lot of work. For me, it’s recognizing everything and everyone that’s important in my life, and making time for it all. Not to mention getting eight hours of sleep.”
Tina Wells, Buzz Marketing Group
Voorhees, NJ

“For me, finding balance is synonymous with the concept of finding enlightenment. One can have glimpses of it, but there’s always room to grow and improve. I personally find balance by asking myself, ‘What is perfect for me right now?’ It’s most important for me to feel joy and have fun on a daily basis in whatever I’m doing. With intention that happens, although there are days when the universe has other plans and I simply utilize the not-so-balanced days as times for observation to correct and continue.”
Brooke Emery, Attraction Boutique
New York City

“Doing everything perfectly is a myth. I let things go that aren’t important. We have a family dinner every night, but my husband is responsible for that. I have a cleaning lady so I can still have a clean house. I’ve gotten rid of or delegated things that I don’t have time to focus on so I can focus on those things that are important, like my business and family. Health and fitness is also very important. I schedule a workout like I would a business meeting, because it helps me mentally, and gives me the energy to continue seeking balance with work and family. It takes a lot of scheduling, but if you want it and all of those things are important to you, you find yourself doing it.”
Kathi O’Neil, Westover Media & City Picks Group
Portland, OR

“Balance is doing what you’re feeling drawn to at that time, while maintaining a healthy relationship with yourself and other important relationships, be it at work or with friends, family, your spouse, etc. When my husband and I first started The Knot, Inc., we were working non-stop and did end up sacrificing some friendships with those who found it hard to understand the kind of business we were nurturing. After the storm calmed, we regained those friendships and many more. If you make the effort to go into business on your own, you have to remember to see it as a privilege and to enjoy every minute of it.”
Carley Roney, The Knot, Inc.
New York City

“I think balance is absolutely achievable. But, it is a myth to believe that balance will come without working very hard at it. Everything in life is balanced! Look at anything in nature and you’ll see that balance is everywhere. It’s what we do that knocks it out of whack by trying to cram too much here or there. We’re meant to do only so much.”
Jennifer Powers, Professional Coach, Speaker & Author
Salem, OR

Keep up the conversation! Add a comment to the thought-tingling quotations posted by the Passion and Fulfillment group in our social network.   Haven’t you always wanted to match wits with Oscar Wilde?